Thursday, July 27, 2006

WE ARE MOVING TO A NEW WEBSITE!

Starting on Friday July 28, 2006 all new posts for The Imus Show Blog will be at this address http://www.imusblog.com/ . The new website includes all the prior posts.

This site will be kept but I won't be updating it. The new site is a hosted website and will allow us to do many more things than Blogger allows. Another reason for the move is Blogger just seems to be unreliable at times.

If anyone has any suggestions for the new site just email Big Roy.

Kofi Annan is an Idiot

Colonel Jack Jacobs said idiotic is not to strong a word to describe Kofi Annan's assertion that Israel intentionally attacked U. N. Peacekeepers. He says further, “ I think three quarters of everything that comes out of Kofi Annan's mouth is ill considered, dead wrong, or self serving. He's not a nice man. He has his own agenda too. So we have to keep that in mind.”

To me Colonel Jacobs is one of the best guests on the Imus Show. He just gives you the impression he's honest about what he says. Mr. Jacobs doesn't seem to have his own agenda like so many pundits.

Imus weighed in on the Olbermann vs O'Reilly feud, here is the exchange:


Imus, "Keith apparently was on the Tonight Show. Here is what I don't
understand, Chris Matthews does the same thing. Every time they're on the
Tonight Show, they show their appearance on their show. I'm just sort of
curious.” Bernard, “They made it, look at me I made it, I was on the Tonight
Show.” Imus, “Apparently Keith is on a feud with Bill O'Reilly.” Bernard,
“That's gotten very ugly.” Imus, “It's not going well for Mr. O'Reilly, does
O'Reilly respond at all?” Bernard, “Well he does in a way by reporting on the
ratings. He mentions MSNBC but never mentions Olbermann by name. Who actually put an O'Reilly mask on at some broadcast conference and did a Nazi salute. You
know it's gnawing at Bill O'Reilly but he would just love to kick Olbermann in
the teeth. But he won't dignify him with a response.” Imus, “Well he had the
opportunity to kick Olbermann in the teeth and didn't seize that. Cause
Olbermann said he was at some affair where O'Reilly was and there were twenty
feet apart. Apparently O'Reilly was staring at Keith. So Keith looked back over
at him like, yea bitch, and O'Reilly looked away and looked down at his shoes.
Wouldn't lock eyes with Keith.”

Later in the show:

Bernard, "...Really ugly though really ugly." Imus, "What did Keith do?" Bernard, "He was at a broadcast function recently he put a mask of O'Reilly in front of his face and did the Nazi salute. Which was harsh." Imus, "According to Keith, Bill O'Reilly on three separate occasions on his program was actually defending Nazi's, did you know that." Bernard, "Ah come on." Imus, "Just reporting the facts."

You can find all kinds of info on the feud here is one website that covers it Olbermann Watch.

Bigfoot Bowman told Imus that Rita Cosby wants to come and do a feature on the Ranch. The response from Mr. Imus is that Rita Cosby is not to bright. Bernard relayed that Keith Olbermann said she is dumber than a suit case full of rocks. The official position of the show seems to be, she is fine, and it looks like this feature will happen.

It appears like most everyone on the show, including Deirdre, thinks Jon Stewart sucks. They are saying he's not funny, CSPAN is more interesting, and the Daily Show is just an opening act for Stephen Colbert. Imus is the only one left who likes him. I'm with Imus on this one; I think he is great.

Cardinal Egan was on the show this morning to give us hope and inspiration. Among many wise things he said was this, “Lord we pray Condi Rice stops the deadly missiles from flying under her watch. Or at least finally finds a man to lodge a missile in her snatch, be Jesus.” Also, “The Imus Ranch is grateful for the summer rain they get. The only hope Mrs. Imus has of getting wet.”

Chris Carlin made the comment that Danica Patrick is a good driver when she has her period.

Commenting on the Andrea Yates case Bernard McGuirk said, “maybe one of the fellow lunatics will cut her throat while she's in the institution, lets hope so.”

Patrick Buchanan was a guest on the show today. He is the author of the upcoming book, State of Emergency: How Illegal Immigration is Destroying America. Mr. Imus has read the galleys of the book and says it's great. Mr. Buchanan says if Israel doesn't invade Lebanon with ground troops and just relies on air power they will lose this war. He thinks Hezbollah is winning the war right now.

Our favorite female member of the Imus Show cast appeared briefly on air today. Tracy Burgess was wearing an orange tank top that showed some nice cleavage. At the request of many fans, The Imus Show Blog has obtained an exclusive picture of our beloved Tracy.



Wednesday, July 26, 2006

16 Year Old Teen Forced to Have Chemotherapy

Dr. Larry Rosen told us a story about a sixteen year old boy named Abraham Cherrix who has Hodgkins Lymphoma. He underwent chemotherapy and then relapsed. The teen had a very difficult time with chemotherapy the first time he had it. So with the support of his parents he sought alternative treatment in Mexico. The family was reported to social services in Virginia. This resulted in a judge issuing an order last Friday forcing the teen to receive chemotherapy.

The problem with this story as reported on the Imus Show this morning is that it left out some very important information. On Tuesday (yesterday) Accomack County Circuit Court Judge Glen A. Tyler suspended the order and set a trial date for August 16th. I don't blame Imus, I blame Bernard McGuirk and Charles McCord for not doing more research. Come on guys, if you want to be taken seriously as a legitimate source of news you have to get your shit straight. You can read the story here.

Imus talked to former Imus Show sports reporter Sid Rosenburg yesterday off the air. It looks like Sid is trying to get back on the show. Imus expressed his support for Chris Carlin. Like I have said before, Carlin is a nice guy but he is way out of his league on the Imus Show. I am thinking maybe Chris has some pictures of Imus having sex with sheep. Something has to be going on for Imus to so vehemently support a guy who shouldn't be there.

Radio talk show host and former publisher for the Jerusalem Post Tom Rose was a guest on the show today. Mr. Rose talked about the conflict in Israel. Saying the argument in Israel is not about whether the country should be at war but on the execution of the war.

Tom Rose went on to say Hezbollah is not only supported by Iran but is a part of the Iranian Military. He says Israeli Intelligence did not know Hezbollah had access to Silkworm missiles, surface to sea missiles, and laser guided drones. Mr. Rose states Israel has no desire to occupy southern Lebanon like they have in the past.

Senator John McCain was a guest today and called down U. N. Secretary General Kofi Annan for accusing Israel of intentionally targeting U. N. Peacekeepers. He says it, “portrayed some of his biases,”referring to Annan. To summarize Senator McCain on his solution for the conflict. He would push for sanctions immediately against Iran for their nuclear program. Seek a resolution to disarm Hezbollah, and set up a peacekeeping force in southern Lebanon.

New York Times columnist Frank Rich was a guest today. He really didn't have much to say and was pretty boring. Mr. Rich did comment about the republicans drinking the kool-aid. I find that funny when no one in the country has passed out more liberal democratic kool-aid than Frank Rich. He is so predictable, the republicans and the Bush administration are wrong about everything. Oh what a revelation , a New York Times columnist thinks the republicans are doing the wrong thing.

Tuesday, July 25, 2006

Did Nicole Kidman Marry a Gay Man?

Radio talk show host Michael Graham wondered out loud, “how many gay guys is Nicole Kidman going to marry?” That shows how much I know about Hollywood culture. I didn't even know Tom Cruise and Keith Urban were rumored to be gay.

Mr. Graham who is based in Boston also told us about a plan from Senator John Kerry. It seems Kerry doesn't think there is enough diplomacy in the Middle East. He suggests we give the diplomats guns so they can wipe out Hezbollah. Kerry says if you elect him president there would be no war in the Middle East. Of course he offered no real plan on how this would be accomplished. This couldn't be another hollow campaign promise from Kerry could it, no of course not.

Bernard McGuirk told us that Amy Robach's new baby looks like Rick Kaplan. Imus thinks it looks like Randy Meyer. Dr. Phil even offered up that maybe it looks like Lester Holt.

Imus described Christie Brinkley as being dumber than a fence post. He suggested Christie's marital problems can't all be their fault. Referring to the fact that Ms. Brinkley has been married four times. Bernard chimed in that Christie has three children with three different fathers.

Imus reported that a man is considering giving him a thousand acres in upstate New York for an east coast version of the Ranch.

The show aired a clip from The Colbert Report with Stephen Colbert interviewing Congressman Robert Wexler. It's funny as hell and you can watch it here.

MSNBC Harball host Chris Matthews proselytized on how the Bush administration is a joke in the Middle East. He went on to say our policy caused the threat to Israel to be increased dramatically. Matthews says Clinton did a good job, of course. He says the U.S. is incapable of playing the role of power broker. That all we do is support the Israeli demands. Matthews says the only way to change the policy is to have an election. Let me guess, we should elect a democrat. I think Chris Matthews is in the wrong job. Maybe he should be working for the DNC, oh wait, maybe he is.

Matthews went on and on about how the voters in Connecticut should vote against Joe Lieberman. He described it as a chance for them to vote against the war. Imus blew him out of the water and made him look stupid by pointing out they shouldn't focus on just one issue. Why do liberal democrats like Matthews always focalize on what we should vote against instead of what we should vote for? I think I know the answer, because they have no ideas. When you vote for a democrat you are not voting for an original idea or plan.

Bernard informed us Joe Lieberman pimped out his wife Hadassah to former President Bill Clinton for his campaign appearance yesterday.

Dr. Phil was a guest today and suggested that Secretary of State Condi Rice join Match.com so she can get some.

Hot babe and self described right wing nut Monica Crowley was a guest today. She has the distinction of being one of the most beautiful women on basic cable. Monica asks the question, how can we have a cease fire with a terrorist organization like Hezbollah. She suggests the only way we can end the conflict is by total destruction of the organization.

Ms. Crowley revealed she listens to the Imus Show while naked in the shower.

Monday, July 24, 2006

Ned Lamont is a "Bug Eyed Ichabod Crane Pencil Neck Phony"

Imus described Ned Lamont as a, “Bug eyed Ichabod Crane pencil neck phony.” Mr. Lamont is running against Connecticut Senator Joe Lieberman.

MSNBC executive Phil Griffin and his wife visited the ranch during this last session.

NBC correspondent Tom Aspell blew off Imus in the middle of an interview. As the camera was running, and in the middle of a question, Aspell walks off and says, “CNBC.” It was very bizarre.

Apparently Chris Carlin is happy that Tiger Woods father died. At least that's what Imus and Bernard accused him of.

We had a new weather bunny named Kristen Cornett on the show today. She is pretty cute but had one problem. Her pants were way to tight. There is a fine line between tight pants looking hot and looking cheap, Ms. Cornett crossed that line.

Newsweek columnist Jonathan Alter says republicans who supported President Bush on stem cell research will be in trouble. This is a tough issue and I hate agreeing with Alter but I do in this situation.

Mr. Alter went on to say he doesn't think Hillary Clinton will get the Democratic Parties nomination.

Imus read a letter from a child named Samantha who had been at the ranch.

Dear Mr. and Mrs. Imus,

I just wanted to say thank you so much. This week has been so exciting and
a great experience. You have inspired me to try my best everyday. I never
thought that I could lope, or get on a horse by myself, tie a calf, or rope a cow. This
week has been very enriching. I think you had a great idea when you built this
ranch. I hope this ranch keeps going until there is a cure for all
cancers.

Thank you so much,

Samantha


NBC foreign affairs correspondent Andrea Mitchell appeared on the show today spouting the liberal party line. Can someone explain to me how a 60 year old woman has acne on her face. I bet she has pimples on her ass too. I've got some advice for you Andrea, how about washing your nasty ass.

President Bill Clinton was a guest today on the Imus Show. Referring to President Bush's speech to the NAACP. Clinton says it took 5 ½ years for Bush to discover there are 37 million black folks in America.

Bo Dietl says we should turn Syria into a “parking lot.” He went on to say the average Muslim family has eight children. This allows them to send two of their children off to blow themselves up. They can afford to lose two children because they have six left. You can always count on Bo for a look at current events from another dimension.

Sunday, July 16, 2006

Imus Show on Vacation

The Imus Show is on vacation and will return July 24th.

Mr. Imus is enjoying his vacation at the Ranch in Readers Digest, N.M. playing tennis and relaxing by the pool. We have been able to obtain a couple of exclusive pictures.

Here is Mr. Imus playing tennis at the Ranch.



The Ranch pool.

Friday, July 14, 2006

Sirius to Buy and Dismantle XM Radio!

Mad Money host James Cramer predicts Sirius CEO Mel Karmazin will buy XM Satellite Radio and dismantle it. Cramer is a pretty smart guy about these things. If I was a XM subscriber or stock holder I'd be thinking hard about the future.

James Cramer quote, "I think Mel takes the stock up to $6.00, buys XM and
becomes the only cable provider, they call it satellite. He's a winner, Mel, he
will make this work. Mel is making the numbers, the XM guys are completely
missing the numbers. XM is pulling down the whole industry. I think if XM didn't
exist Sirius stock would be at double...He will give you double the moment he
buys XM, he WILL buy XM. There is no reason for XM to exist." Imus, "But the
technology is different what does he do dismantle XM?" Cramer, "Yes. You only
need one of these companies it has to be a monopoly. There is no reason to
compete against each other then you are just paying a fortune for content.
Therefor no one can make money. Basically Mel will close XM and just make it
Sirius. This is all prediction by me but I think it has to happen in order for
that industry to work."


Cramer also accused retailer Abercrombie & Finch of promoting teenage pornography and sex.

Imus asked NBC War Correspondent Richard Engel if anyone in the current Israeli conflict had suggested a prisoner exchange, DUH! Where the hell has Imus been? Even Engel said, “of course.” It was one of the dumbest questions I've heard Imus ask. I know you're thinking well he was just asking because he thinks the audience might have had that question on their mind. That's the problem, that Imus would think his audience was that stupid and hadn't been following the conflict in the news.

Imus described the disgruntled employee's who may have depicted Jack Welch as “Jack the Zipper,” as, “the ones who had to get the abortions.”

Joe Benigno did sports today for the Imus Show. My god what a difference. Chris Carlin is a nice guy but we all know he is out of his league on the Imus Show. Benigno showed energy and
charisma that Carlin will never have. Imus needs to replace Chris Carlin now.

I got an email asking me to mention what Deidre said about the Combating Autism Act. This morning Deidre accused Senator Chris Dodd of lying about knowing the language in the Autism Act had not been changed when he appeared on Imus. It looks like Dodd is just another shit-bird politician who can't tell the truth about anything.

Imus reported that MSNBC General Manager Dan Abrams doesn't watch the Imus in the Morning Show. From what I can tell Dan Abrams watches Fox and Friends.

Imus sold one of the Hummers to a guy from Florida.

Commie liberal hack Andrea Mitchell blames the Middle East conflict on President Bush. She is so damn transparently bias it's almost sickening. I respect both liberals and conservatives if they are honest and have something intelligent to say. But don't pretend you're an unbiased news person when it's obvious to everyone exactly what your political leanings are.

Tom Brokaw is hosting a global warming special on the Discovery Channel at 9pm Sunday. On July 23rd at 7pm on NBC Brokaw has another special called “Separate and Unequal” about racism in America.

Tracy Burgess appeared on camera today dressed like a hooker. She was looking damn good, juicy and delicious. Tracy would probably never answer any of my emails but I would love to get some hot pictures of her and put them on this website. I think she has more fans out here than she knows about.

For those who didn't see Tracy this morning I will describe her. She has long straight blonde hair and a great tan. Tracy was wearing glasses which gives her that slutty school teacher look . She had on a fancy green tank top kind of shirt that showed just a little bit of cleavage. Imus said she had on shorts but we couldn't see them. Even Deidre said Tracy looked hot this morning. Now that's something we could run with. If MSNBC really wants to get ratings they need to have Deidre and Tracy make out on camera. It worked for Howard Stern, Deidre and Tracy are better looking than any of the women Stern has on.

Thursday, July 13, 2006

Warning Letter Found at the Imus Ranch

The following letter was found in a room at the Imus Ranch formerly occupied by Zack and Jimmy:

"F the Imus Ranch

The people here are enslaving us. They work you until your fingers bleed, no B.S. They don't give a S--- if you are home sick. They give you fake meat, the food is S---. You do four hours of chores, it is a concentration camp. Hide your electronics and candy. They are Nazi's F-ing Nazi's. This isn't a joke, good luck."

That's exactly the way it was read on the air this morning. We don't know if they wrote out the cuss words in the letter or not.

In response to a Fortune Magazine article former General Electric CEO Jack Welch appeared on Hardball last night. The reaction from Imus is that Mr. Welch should be put to sleep and he made a fool of himself. Imus informed us that Mr. Welch has a proclivity for being chummy with the ladies. Imus said there is, “no grass growing under Jack's wiener,” and that Mr. Welch's nickname at GE was, “Jack the zipper.”

Charles McCord has a piano recital scheduled for September 14, 2006, maybe.

Imus reported that the Senate gutted the Combating Autism Act. We will see if Senator Dodd is a man of his word and stands up for the poor little children with autism or just ignores them.

Christopher Whitcomb the author of, White: A Novel, and several other books appeared on Imus this morning. He discussed the internal Iraq problems, saying that he believes the war is no longer a matter of terrorists or insurgents. He thinks it's a full blown civil war of Shiites against Sunni.

There is one child out at the ranch this session with a rare brain tumor. The child is restricted in that he can't lift his hands above above his shoulders. Wyatt came up with a great idea on how the child could participate in the rodeo activities. He suggested that the child rope sidearm instead of swinging the rope above his head. The child ended up getting 20 in a row yesterday.

Connecticut Senator Joe Lieberman pointed out that his opponent Ned Lamont has taken five different positions for getting the United States out of Iraq. Lieberman went on to say he has no regrets for his support of the war.

New York Times columnist David Brooks thinks Joe Lieberman will pull out a win in the election. He feels Lieberman is the clear choice in the race for senator from Connecticut.

Lou Rufino played Atlantic City by Levon Helm/The Band. It doesn't get much better than Levon Helm.

Great show today I laughed my ass off.